Newspaper Archive of
The Catalina Islander
Avalon, California
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June 4, 1924     The Catalina Islander
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June 4, 1924
 

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PAGE rWELVE fire isAcidental, JI' 'EP IT Up Refined Crude The Retort Courteous Two high-school girls were engaged in conversation in the street. Said the first: "Toln tried to kiss me last night and I wouldn't let him." "Did it make him angry ?" her COln- panion asked. "I shouhl say. He said he wished he had called on you."--Maryville, Mo. Democrat-Forum. Rae--Betty is very sl0~v. Mae--She certainly is. It has taken her thirty years to reach twenty.-- Penn. Punch Bowl. Not Too Long Negro Preacher--Daws, you take dis woman to be your spouce now and forever ? Victim--Parson, couldn't you leave off de forever part ?--Virginia Reel. "Pray, jester, what is a Knight of the Garter ?" "A royal supporter, my Iord."-- Northwestern Purple Parrot. Half and Half Mr.--"Am I never to have nay way about anything ?" Mrs.--"Oh, yes. When we agree you may have your way;, but when we disagree I'll have mine."--New York Sun and Globe. Reads a 1-'ullman Company placard: "Strangers who invite you to play cards generally are too lucky for the average niortal," " Always That Way It is a common saying that the wo- man will have the last word, but at the athletic club recently the case was re- versed. Husband and wife had been arguing from soul) to dessert, and fin- ally the wife murnmred, plaintively: "[ don't know. what would happen if you and I ever agreed," whereupon the man glowered at her and replied bit- terly: "I'd be wrong; I'd be wrong." Hard-hearted--I am through with all this. Tomorrow we separate. THE CATALINA HI SCHOOL "SUGAR (Continued from Page 1 1, ColUr~ 4) ETIQUETTE QUERIES Dear Mr. Editor:--ls it have more than two your mouth at one time ? Ans.--No, not in mine, It hold them. 13ut ,'on might in yours without self. Dear Mr. Editor :--Is it to Hoyle" to come to school utes late ? Ans.--Absolutely. But be. that a teacher does not pete Some of them do not think proper. FAMOUS LAST I say, Betty, let's not get ~r sons today. I think 1 will put a tack 00 teacher's chair. Let's go out of the room vchilel Hahn is talking" to that visitor. Hand me Miss Mason's I want to see bow many have got. I don't think that Mr. Dunkl care if we would take the apart to see if it is like the in the Physics book. TODAY'S INTELLIGENCI~ How would you eliminate the from "demerits?" Doris---Name a bird of preY, Elizabeth--The robin. DorisIAre you sure ? Elizabeth--I'm just as sure earthworm is. 0~O~C~00~--"1 chance, and I'll promise never to put The Malays call it the W In many countries it is made poison in your coffee again.--Norte tic pet.by the inhabitants, I Dame Juggler. ._______ it in their homes. "Poor Fish!" United States fishery em~pl Son,: "Why do they call men 'poor 67,000 persons, and its produc fish? ' ,, is valued at over $15,000,000 a: Father: Because a lot of young from the water. fools are attracted by colored rags and feathers." MICKI,E SAYS---- ! He spilled some ink upon the floor, I ~ ,~~ i I looked a little hurt: With the New Crepe For \hen he wiped it up again, ] ~/ASORF. ~ HAVE FOLK He used my only shirt! [ ~A'q ~,~ ~I'P, I DIDMT KI4OVJ Soles, High or Low. --Princeton Tiger. [ HA~4DLIED "l't'taTI, I MA~ All Styles, All Prices I SPECIAL "TRIP OVE ' Big Customer--Can't you wait on me ? L~Y WEEK "Co C.TEC All Sizes. now? I'm in a hurry and I want. two I IC W ,L AR.'CtCLg'l, Wkl" I l)onnds of liver. Butcher--Sorry, madam, but there [" DOM'T HCK).aO~dFJt.'X'~e~,~ are two ahead of you. You surely I~l~ ~J40W ~'T'qOU~ won't want your liver out of order, ~ ,.~ SLL~. w iyj~b~K~ i i will yOU ?--Washingtn Cugar's Paw' ~-~~ ~'tERSELF ~Ok] Doctor--Do I think I can cure vour " catarrh ? Why, l'm sure of it. " Patient--So you are very familar with the disease? Doctor--I should say so! I've had it all lily life !--Judge. " LIK:E v-G I New A.ngler--Won't you join us on I our next fishing trip ? Old,Timer--Well, you get in the boat and Ill see if there is any room left. $~.00 $?-.2~ The bootleg whiskey they're selling these days is terrible. A fellow in HEYWOOD,S Boalsburg took two drinks of the stuff the other (lay and then went out deer ........ ~ hunting with beanblower.--Penn State L,. 116 Froth. The Best Reason for Buying in Avalon Sumner Avenue, Opposite Atwater Hotel Pity the poor prize-fighter. He can Around the Corner--But is Pays to WMk. scarcely look his opponent in the face without batting an eye.--WestVirginia _ Mosnshine. Wife--Oh, Reggie, give me one more more, and nearly always hit. over the surface of the water. the fish launches, with wond~ curacy of aim, a tiny jet of. is said to be able to projec *bullets to a distance of flies, which are to be curious habit of gunning for which consists of bugs, i~ In the Polynesian waters groups of "archer" fish whicl"