Newspaper Archive of
The Catalina Islander
Avalon, California
Lyft
March 19, 1924     The Catalina Islander
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March 19, 1924
 

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PAGE TWELVE THE CATALINA ISLJ i i i i, i i i Our new Baseball Goods are on display this week. Now is the time to get ready for the season. W.e can fit you out with anything you want in Balls. Bats, Shoes, Uniforms, etc. CATALINA HARDWARE COMPANY- Refined Crude WISHES THEY'D pA~t The Burlesque Hound 5lother--"What kind of a show did Pop take vou to, Bobby?" Bobby-5'It was a dandy, Mamma. They had ladies dressed in stockings np to their nccks."--Samis Cauldron. Hen Talk "That's the guy I'm laying for," said the hen as the farmer crossed the barnyard. Flaming Youth- Ed--"I am looking for a book that would interest a university co-ed." Clerk--"Very sorry, sir; but we are out of that type just now. You see, we have already been raided twice this month."--Whiriwind. Dumb- Bell Say, Bud; did ye see that swallow? See what swallow? That bird ? No; what did it swallow? Dumber Poem My father is a butcher, My mother cuts the meat; I'm the little weenie Who runs aronnd the street. Had the Bait Mother--"If you wanted to go fish- ing,first .),v, hy didn't .vou come and ask me Johnny--"Because I wanted to go fishing."--New Haven Register, MY APPLE TART Warren L. Bassett in Judge Mv girl's not much. S, he doesn't know \Vhat makes the seasons Come and go. Mail Carrier--No man Of] II/'COlI|II Of OIJIPP than 1. Fr|end--How's that? M. C.--llally 1 bear the them all. Husband's Sometimes, dear, I'm Confession; not a boast! But the nicest things I say to Are those I mean the --Striekland They're Off ! "\Vonder how Jack and Be! getting along with their love "Oh, they're getting along now. He soht his flivver and a racing cat*. "Overhead Expense" The Boss--"What's this exI)ense account, 'Overhead $4.00' ?" The Traveling an umbrella I bonght." A Bad Housekeeper Miss Young--ln Turkey a l doesn't know" her husban(t tttltl ~_ She cotfldn't name she has married him. The farthest star. Mrs. Wedd--Vv'hy mention Or tell you what especially? Electrons are. The Very First Kiss ! ' i , I"'t'''*'''' w otjack ' The ~hole worhl wide, he} riding in his car and. " She knows her stuff-- kissed her a tire blew out. I'm satisfied! "Oh Jack," she nmrrnered. lucky that we didn't stay at, A Guilty Conscience Father is such a light sleeper. Flanne Tomlny had been playing truant . ~ , i from school and had spent a long. Catahna will give you the UH i 2:2: beautiful day fishing. On his way your fife. Come to Catalina, back he met one of his cronies, who he Best accosted him with the usual question, ' "Catch anything?" " MICKI'E "Ain't been home vet," was the quick Ever Happen to You? I~ POOP.. DUI~I~"f V4lbl," i SH ! Rq I was. dark night and the n,otorist .p, t was lost. Presently he saw a sign on } ~1141~4 ~kll4ON~ 012. ~0~ a post. \ith great diffeulty he climb- "l'~m= ~L~BaF-CT Og "1~~ ~ ed the post, struck a match and read, "A'I4EH K~14~" 1~I,3*'~-~M~ I::~B~q 0 I !1 ~ g "\Vet Paint." ! n Maybe Thought His Legs Safer . A~4 ~..~K~L~.,~,~PP D ~ !'d } You can Buy at any ~ & motorist meeting an old colored ,~4,KIK6 ,ll4k-H ~S i~ {,{ nlan trudging along the dnstv road ? ~ . . oht ,nan. "Ah reckon mah o1'laigs sizes in stock at ........ ~ will take me 'long fast enough." ' "Aren't afraid, are you, uncle ? Have I ,, r R " ! I i 1155 Nevah but once, .ah, was the reply "an' den Ah didn't let all mah weigh't down. --I oston Transcript. Didn't Require "Brushing Off" EYWOOD S U Man--"Is New York the next stop?" Porter--"Yes, sah; brush you Off, sah ?" z fan~ No thanks, I I1 get off my- ' .... se f. --Western Christian Advocate. The ~ Hjelp! Hjelp! , Bjornson Bjornstein wjent swjimmin 116 Sumner Avenue, Opposite Atwater Hotel II Around the Comar---But is Pays to Walk. It Hjis ejostume he looked vjery sljim in. II Sjome djames hjappened bjy-- W Tjook hjis djuds on the sljy-- Anjd he's stjill rjunning after thjose ~,,,~.~ ....-~.. .IL~- , ~ ~._~""'-~1;;:;:=~~~ wjimmin.